I hate text messaging.

I have a normal flip phone.  Texting from it is awkward and inefficient.

I guess some find it a more convenient way to shoot a quick note back-and-forth, without the “hassle” of a 23-second conversation.  I get that.  But then I have to respond via text, using that horrible system of poking numbers several times for this letter and several more times for that letter.  It’s worse for me, because I actually care about things like commas and spelling and capital letters.  I don’t claim to be a perfect grammarian, but in general I prefer reading and writing things wherein rule-breaking doesn’t jar you from the actual communication going on. “U wnt 2 see muvie 2mro?” actually pisses me off.

Insult to injury, there’s my wonderful mobile service provider—with whom I subscribe about as enthusiastically as I voted for John Kerry, and for the same reason: the pure evil that is the competition—who charges me $0.15 every time I send a text.  Fair enough, I guess, but then they also charge me $0.15 to RECEIVE a text, a form of communication I didn’t ask for and don’t want.  I’ve made this complaint vocally before, and everyone points out that I should just add texting to my calling plan. How is that better? That’s still me paying for something I don’t want. In fact, it’s me agreeing long-term to pay for something I don’t want, whether I use it or not.

I actually considered it just now. In my last statement, I had sent 21 messages and received 33. It’s BrevityTV.com’s fault; we had enough productions going on in December that people were texting me all the time. So I spent an extra 8 bucks or so on just texts. Perhaps that puts me in a place where it’s more cost effective to suck it up and pay $5 a month for 250 messages. But I feel like it’s a slippery slope if I get in the habit of texting freely.  In August when it comes time to upgrade my phone, I’ll start looking at the kinds with the flip-out keyboards, and be in danger of spending a few more hundred dollars on something I don’t want. I want my normal flip phone.  And if someone needs something from me, I want them to call me.  That’s why I carry a phone around.

So please, you avid texters, reach me by phone or by e-mail. Your fancy keyboarded portable communications device can do both.

It’s the first tiny crack of progress in the writers’ strike: Letterman’s production company, Worldwide Pants, has successfully negotiated to come back on January 2nd, along with the rest of the late-night shows, with the major difference that he will have writers.  How did he do it?  He gave the writers what they’re asking for.

That’s going to have to put some pressure on the other networks, whose ratings will undoubtedly be smaller than a fresh show that’s actually written.  Plus, there’s no doubt Dave will actually talk about the strike, and he–like the other hosts–has actively supported the writers.

If there weren’t already a million reasons to prefer Letterman to Leno, there’s one big one now.

So I was working on finding stock footage and other video repositories on the net for one of the projects we’re planning to have ready for the launch of BrevityTV.   I came across this interesting source of moving images: Progressive car insurance places the highway safety crash test videos online, so you can see what would happen to your car in a crash.

In my case, my head and chest will be fine, but there’s risk to my left leg, and my right leg will probably be messed up.

Don’t know if I wanted that knowledge…

If you are a Sesame Street fan, this is just about the coolest use of the internet since pandora.com.

Hundreds of old Sesame Street clips are now up at http://video.sesameworkshop.org/.  I recommend the African alphabet song.

My sketch comedy writers group is down a writer. The new person we brought in, who was great and definitely contributed a sketch I plan for us to shoot, decided to do the whole change-of-job, plan-your-wedding path. So I’m once again seeking an elite-level comedy writer who will work for free. And, ideally, has a vagina. We are left with four men and one woman, and I would sure rather have slot #6 be reserved for a female, so we don’t become 5-to-1.

The only thing is, ads looking only for female writers are always creepy. They contain something about wanting a woman’s perspective on the writing, but always come off reading like a singles ad about how we’ll get together for coffee, try writing some dialogue together, and see if we have chemistry. I fear for the women who respond to them. Only thing is, female perspective can be important, and it really IS the reason I’m trying to find a woman to join our writers meeting. Oh well. Time to publish another slightly creepy ad, I guess.

I tried to be a little creative this time:

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