Last month I posted a comedy monologue for women I had written on a lark. I was surprised by the immediate reaction it received. I wound up talking to several female friends with acting backgrounds who agreed wholeheartedly that it’s tough to find good comedic material for women. The screenwriterguy.com stats seem to back up what my friends said, as a steady stream of hits have come through from people searching for female monologues. This morning I was surprised to see that the monologue post had pushed to the top position of most-read posts on the site. The whole thing has left me thinking about the delicate art of writing female roles. As part of my meditation on the subject, I decided to create this list of Top Ten Strongest Female TV Characters.

The subject of strongest female characters begs definition. I’ve learned that it’s a far more complicated issue than one might think. A member of my old comedy troupe once expressed disappointment in the roles she had been playing in a show. She felt that she was constantly the mom, the girlfriend… rarely the funny person. (It’s a far deeper issue than I have time for in this explanation, and it’s a question with which I’ve heard many sketch troupes wrestle. Let me quickly invite you to think about how many female players there were on Kids in the Hall or in the Monty Python crew.) Anyway, long after this member of our troupe had forgotten the conversation, we were casting a show and I went (probably a little too far) out of my way to make sure she had nothing but strong characters to play. She was the funny person to someone else’s straight man. Her characters had authority and status. I casually asked later about how this new show felt, and I was shocked to hear her explain that her favorite moment was a number in which she was a back-up singer: “It’s the first time in the show I feel sexy,” she said. Clearly I had something to learn about what defined a good female role.

So when I list strong female characters, my goal is not entirely about feminist ideals or girl power, but to find writing that creates a distinct, defined character. She must be more than a foil to the male lead. Her femininity should not be her defining characteristic, and yet it must be intrinsic to her identity. Succinctly, what roles would the female actor just love to sink her teeth into? What roles would be really fun to play? Further, Xena the Warrior Princess doesn’t count as a strong woman just because she’s a woman who’s strong. And while Mary Tyler Moore was a masterfully written and groundbreaking show, Mary’s significance had as much to do with her situation as with any specialness to her character. Like any character in any story, our strongest female TV characters should help us understand a corner of the human condition, the only restriction being that the understanding come from a woman’s perspective. Here’s my list:

#10

Buffy and Sydney–Yes, there’s a certain originality to the female butt-kicker. Not often do we meet a woman we expect to take down all comers, mano-a-mano.However, the quality that earns these heroines a place on the chart is how little they actually want their gifts. Both Buffy and Sydney gained specialness and destiny from forces beyond their control. While each has a champion’s heart and cannot help but use her skills when called upon, each express a need to live a normal life as a normal girl. It is in this duality that the depth of their characters lies. The action scenes are fun, but if you want to see when Sarah Michelle Gellar and Jennifer Garner truly shine as actors, look for the moments when they cry over a lost love or struggle against an authority figure. That’s the part that truly makes them strong female characters.

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Sometimes the title of a post speaks for itself. Here are my thoughts about some of the worst changes to Television over the last 25 years or so.

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Death may be the one aspect of life that shows up LESS on television than in reality (excluding, of course, those shows that start every episode with one, where it is featured far MORE than statistically plausible.) Death can be a taboo subject, perhaps harkening to more superstitious times when to name was to invite it. I thought I’d reflect for a post on how television shows through history have handled the ultimate facet of life. When TV is at its best, reverent or not, death is handled artfully. Of course, we know that when TV is at its worst… Here are my selections of notable storytelling surrounding the death of a main or recurring character. Because they really do fall into extremes, and to save me from sorting through which Sopranos character really had it coming, I feel like I have to break this Top Ten into five best and five worst:

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You know how we frequently go see a movie not because of its genre, or who made it or what it’s about, but because of who’s in it? I’ve been thinking about which performers have earned my trust, such that their involvement alone is enough for me to believe I will see a great movie.

Now, today’s Top 10 list does not necessarily include my favorite actors, or the people I think deliver the best performances. Michael Caine is fantastic, but you never know when he might make a Bewitched or a Miss Congeniality. As much as I’ll expect to like his performance in anything he does, I can’t trust John Malkovich to pass on scripts like Eragon or Art School Confidential. Steve Martin is one of my favorite entertainers, but he has also made some real duds.

And there are, of course, eye candy performers whose movies I will catch no matter what. I admit to you here and now to watching both Underworld and its atrocious sequel for a chance to see Kate Beckinsale in vinyl. But that hardly makes her a performer whose taste in movies I trust.

Qualifiers have few sell-outs picture in their career, and overall have good taste in what projects they should take on. I haven’t seen every movie ever, so I’m sure I’ll mess up on somebody, but here’s my list:

#10

Johnny Depp–This guy was my favorite actor since long before it was cool to have Johnny Depp as your favorite actor. We’re talking Jump Street early He brings so much to every project he touches that they may or may not be great before he comes on board. Maybe it is a self-fulfilling prophesy that movies he choses will be good. Would you have trusted a Charlie and the Chocolate Factory remake if he hadn’t been in it? And his career has pretty much been great project after great project, all the way back to the first Nightmare on Elm Street. So why not further up on this list? Well, there’s the fact that he seems to want to play a pirate for the rest of his life, for one thing. And then he has stinkers like Sleepy Hollow, From Hell, and The Corpse Bride to answer for. But I have to be forgiving, chalking those films up to his willingness to risk-take, realizing that that same risk-taking brought us Blow, Chocolat, and Benny & Joon. Can’t wait to see his Sweeny Todd.

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